Nervous

As far as I can see, I can't sleep tonight. Due to the fact that I drank Ice Tea. Something about Ice Tea make me can't sleep..lol lol. It's not that I'm nervous because tomorrow meaning today (Monday 28th) it's my orientation day. I have to wake up as 6am. Sigh. Long time didn't wake up so early. I don't know whether I can wake up or not. The thing is, I'm worried about work also. Cat will be lonely and mum will have a lot of issues with the workers especially the troublesome most, MY AUNT SELINE.

She's beautiful. She's funny at times. But she's evil. I can tel you that. She make my mother fall sicky and went in to the hospital. This happens ages ago. What happen was, she and another two of the workers quit at the same time. Workers name was Fannie and Kwan. Kwan was influence by them. But Fannie is the worst. She goes club every night and comes to work half drunk. Always slack of and doesn't even WORK. Ask for salary and borrowed from my mother, at the end what happen. Said my mum didn't pay enough for her and make my mother fell into the hospital. No one wants this type of person to work for them.

As far as I'm concern, the fact that I'm leaving for college tomorrow it's like HELL to me. I wanted to work. But not with all my heart. I wanted to study more than work. But working has money to spend every end of the month (Salary). I have to let go of work. I have to. My mother can handle it.

Discouraged

April 16th: Wednesday

Working all day and tiring. Didn't wash my hair because I wanted it to be straight. It was silly. I was about to wash it this morning but then I realize that my hair still looks refreshing. I decided. Leave it until tonight. So I went to work looking like that. Here's a picture of me with straight hair.

April 17th : Thursday

OH MY GOD! Today I got many things to do. For example. Wake HIM up! It's a very hard task for me because he's a heavy sleeper. After waking HIM up, I have to gewt myself ready for my Embroidery class which I skip for a lot of time. Almost ONE MONTH I DIDN'T ATTEND class. I was busy the whole month. With work and preparations for my studies and hanging out with friends at night. I've been going out at night lately. Maybe because of all this stress. I don't know what to do. that's why I chose to hang with the twins at night. So back to the topic. I was really late for my class. My boyfriend is really tired of work. I don't dare to wake him up. But at the end I force him to wake up. I prepared and send him to Central Market, which is very near to Sg. Wang. But before class I have to drop HIS PHONE to the Sony Ericsson service center. By the time I reach there, I was late. It's like 2 pm plus already. I give up. I skip my class again. So I waited for HIM to come and find me after his meeting with his tutors. So I waited. Waited. At last we meet up and walk around. Ever since he started working, we seldom had a long conversation. It's like no feeling towards me and him nor this RELATIONSHIP. I misses him even more when he is not around me. But couldn't tell him that. Don't wnat him to think that I'm thinking too much. We went to Sg. Wang to drink something because it felt so hot outdoors.

After several hours of walking around, he has to go meet up with his friend and I have to meet with Emilio and B2 Gang. Emilio's birthday party is tonight! Luckily I have a present lying around. Wrap it and hurriedly to the hostel to pick up Kana. She wants me to go with her though. So I decided to go with her. We had fun in the party though. I miss them a lot. It's like everyone never change. I left my ex college for a year already. I was hurtful when I leave and happy when I came back. But now, all of them is near graduation. Time passes so fast. Pictures of tonight.

Birthday Boy: Emilio (Happy Birthday)


Me and Jo
Me, Ah Keong and Li Ming

The Gang

My Former Classmates and few of Emilio's friends


Kana, Me, Emilio and Seng Yew

The Gang B2gether


After the party. Man. Haha.

Look at the poor guy

April 18th : Friday

Quite busy today in the shop. I didn't eat anything though. lol lol. Work in the morning. 9.30am until 7pm. 7pm i got piano until 7.45pm. After that meet up with Lis at Great Eastern Mall. I fetching her back from work. I didn't know Thanesh and Jan also going to fetch her. We end up racing each other . At the end, I arrive first. But at the same time, Jan also arrive. The competition was very tight now. I was behind me even though I arrive first. I took some pictures today. It's mostly me. But there's one picture is about nail. I think it's cool.

This is the nail Art picture


Me with Long Lashes

Nicely Done

April 19th: Saturday

Celebrated Twins Birthday tonight. Past Midnight. Pictures.

At NZ. The Cake and The happy face twins.

Lex wasn't happy. But at last she does.

So sweet

April 20th : Sunday

Morning I get up and prepared myself to work. I don't know what I want to wear so I get this Purple blouse with a mini skirt (Jeans). I hadn't put on my make up. I scared it will melt when I get to the shop. So, I bring my make up tools to the shop and get ready there. Today is the Twins birthday! I'm thrilled. We ate at Chilli's in KLCC. It was fun. We took a lot of pictures.

Tonight I witness a very tragic thing. Uncle Erild went bizarre. I saw everything. I was so angry! I wanted to kill him instantly. But I can't do that. Why? Because I don't want to end up in jail. I realize that every one of my friends has a problem and this are theirs. I was so scared at first. But after a long period, my anger rise. I was so fucked up! Believe me. If you're in this situation, you'll definately be like me.

Another amazing thing happen. I was so close. Since we broke up, we never get along. But now, he is like part of my best friend now.

Factless

This is a picture I got it from my friend's profile. I love this picture.

I never! Last night, there's a person I hated the most messaged me on MSN. Her name is Nancy Ng. In fact, I'll just call her B*itch. She is a DOUBLED HEADED SNAKE, A WEASEL, A TWO TIMER E. T. C. She asked about me and everything. Plus, She is in fact RUDE! Keep saying bad and negative things about my life, relationship and other stuff that she can think about. Since the first day I met her (at High School). I always dislike her. Don't trust her. She has A LOT OF PROBLEMS and none of them has a solution! Well, she tried to ask me things about me and my HIM but I was clever and ready. Whatever she say, I hit her back like a big GIANT rock! She was SPEECHLESS. In fact, She avoid a conversation with me. Luckily I was prepared enough. My BRAIN never stops me.

I told this to my mum and colleague (Catherine). Believe me. Can't tell everything to mothers. THEY WILL FIND FAULT IN WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO SAY. We end up fighting in the car and I stated something really awful to her. I was SO SHOCKED as in what I'd say earlier. I said "The sight of YOU makes me sick!". I know. It's really hurtful. I WISHED I CAN TAKE IT BACK. I know she is hurt. I tried to be nice. But I really can't CONTROL MY TEMPER.

Workaholics, Birthdays and Sadness

April 9th, 2008 : Wednesday

I was worried sick the next day. I kept sending text message to the twins. They say they were ok and nothing happens. I work whole day. But at least my off day is on Thursday. Nothing really happen today though. Around 12.30am, I fetch HIM from his house to my house. He took two days off. I kept asking why he wants to come and stay over. He says he misses me and wanted to see me and HUG me at night. So, after few minutes of pushing, I fetch him to my house and we chatted until I fell asleep at his arms. But soon after, I climb back to my bed as it to I don't want his hands to go numb.

April 10th, 2008 : Thursday

My off day has arrive. We woke up early to get breakfast together. After breakfast, I send him home and I want back to get prepared for my Embroidery Class. On the way to class, It's raining heavily. I was so carefully driven the path way. Sometimes I can hardly focused on the road as it was raining heavily. When I arrive at Times Square, it was too late for me to go to class. I send the phone back to the Service Centre and waited for half an hour.

After picking up the phone, I didn't mention about the whole keypad have to change. By tomorrow have to go get it done. By then it was already 3pm. I was too late to go back. So, I went back to my home instead and freshen up myself. Supposedly, me and HIM decided to watch a movie. But I don't allow him due to his feet rashes and arm as well. I wanted him to rest. He asked me to buy him Clay pot Chicken Rice. I went to Wangsa Maju to buy. But the stall didn't open. HE STILL WANTS TO EAT IT. So i get it from Hai - O instead. Luckily, they open! I was thrilled. Waiting there for about 2 Minutes. She prepared for me and soon after I'm on my way to his place. I was totally WET. But what the hey, the guy has to eat. So, we canceled our movie session and stayed at home instead. After he finishes his dinner, it's time for me to go. I have a date with the twins. Finally hung out with them and chatted. till 11pm and it's time for me to leave as well. CURFEW!

April 11th, 2008 : Friday


I went back to Times Square with my Best Budd, Sum. We had our lunch there and waited for the phone to finish repairing. After getting the phone, we went to Pavilion to buy us J Co donuts. I'm addictive towards these particular multi colored donuts. While queuing up, I've decided to test the keypads. I press everything and went through the pictures gallery. I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO TEST. I saw a picture with HIM and HER together. I was shocked. The first picture I've seen it before. But there's a second picture. I was shocked and HURT! He told me he didn't have anything to do with her anymore. BUT NOW THIS? I was really heart broken. Sum comforted me. I was half way crying my eyes out. We almost broke off. I ALMOST BROKE OFF WITH HIM! I was like a lifeless soul. I was broken.

I called him several times and he say several things. To cut a long story short, we got back together. I didn't pronounce the "B" word. Around 11.15pm, went out with him and his friends to celebrate his birthday. His friends bought him a wrist watch. It's beautiful. Overall, I send him back home after the celebration and he kiss me goodbye.

Me, Birthday boy and His Friends

His Best Friends and Birthday Boy Tirus

Cutting The CAKE (Venue: Heaven The Curve)

Taking pictures

Me and Birthday Boy: Tirus Lao gong

April 12th, 2008 : Saturday

Tonight was really rushing. After temple dinner, I need to rush out to fetch Sum because her birthday is on the 13th. We celebrate the midnight fest. Meaning, me and his bf wait until the clock strikes midnight and wish her happy birthday.

Here's a picture of me and her bf has drawn as a present.

April 13th, 2008 : Sunday

Took a very nice picture. Enjoy.

Alcoholic drunkard, Anti Social and Bisexual

Hey, it's me again. Notice that there is no blog 4# because I didn't wrote it due to that fact that I was working the whole day and HE came to my house nearly midnight. Now, it's 8 minutes to midnight. I must hurry up and write. You see. Tonight was the worse night ever. My friends (Twins) are having problems with her step dad. Their real dad past away cause of death was sickness. Aunt Susie was having troubles with the Norway Guy (Erild). I just only found out that he hits her more than once. I was so scared when I went to their house just now. It was like a movie where the insane father BANGING ON THE DOOR AND CUTTING OFF THE ELECTRICITY.

3minutes to midnight.

My heart was pounding so fast and My fucking sister and her friend can laugh like it's not a big deal. FOR ME IT IS! They are my friends. Without them, I wouldn't be in this life anymore. My asshole sister has a lot of friends. She is ANTI SOCIAL towards her own FAMILY! Hear me? OWN FAMILY! I don't even know why she is becoming like those who careless about their family. Plus, she drinks alcohol more than water! Hangs with her friends 24-7! I'm so stressed out. I really need a break. College is about to start and I'll be ending my working career for now. I don't know what else to do. I felt like I'm a bubble or a balloon that is about to burst. A volcano that is about to erupt. MY LIFE IS A TOTAL MESS HAVING THIS KIND OF SISTER! THAT NEVER WILLING TO HELP OUT OR NEVER WILLING TO HANG WITH THE FAMILY. I'm broken.

12:01am

HIS Birthday is coming by the way. I gave him present earlier already. But still, I don't even know what to get him EXACTLY. So I gave him money instead. I realize I have my mum's gens. Thinking NEGATIVE all the time. But HE seem to think that it's normal already seeming that I said that everyday. I really need to change that attitude form now on.

My Tuesday

Today quite boring. No money no lunch. Sigh~ Birthday Birthday Birthday! I don't know what to get for HIM and also my Best Friend. Sigh~ One is on the 11th and the other one is on the 13th. I celebrate with them early. I don't want to take off on Friday.

Sigh~Forcefully have to take because Friday is HIS birthday. Sigh~ I just gave HIM RM600 enough for HIS birthday present.

My Best Friend. I don't even know what to get her. If I got money, Louie Vuitton ALL THE WAY. But I'm not that rich now, am I?

In shop, on the other hand, it's much more of a funny situation. My colleague, (Meow) 24-7 MOLESTED by her. But of course for fun. In the middle of work, I still got text HIM. At least there's texting going on. I miss him so darn much. My Tuesday ends with me getting two regular customer.

At night, hang out with the TWINS, Thanesh, Fai and Jumah. It is very funny once you hang with these bunch. They make you laugh a lot. I like hanging with them. Especially Fai. His movements and everything about him is very silly and plus Jumah, even though I didn't know him but I can sense he is the funniest person. Twins will fight back what Jumah and Fai say. Thanesh is somehow quiet every time we hang. But he is cool in some way. Of course, there will be Jan (XMBF). For me, I have a feeling he doesn't like to see me. I mean, He has the facial expression that he does not like to see me. I don't know why, but I had that feelings in his facial expression. Sigh~ WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?

Now I'm on the phone with HIM. Hearing HIM complain about Buying a CAR! He cannot understand the problem his own dad is having. That is FINANCIAL PROBLEM. I can't blame him. He is tired of his work. He tells me every night about his work and all. I care him more than any guys I'm with. So far as I'm concern, I hope to see him bloom. I'll support him until the end. Plus, he is still young. I don't want to talk much about HIM. All I can do is be tolerant towards him and my family.

End~

Working is tough.

I wish everyday would be the best day ever for me. Even I will work myself out. Just only today, I found out that my sister receive RM100 from Uncle Desmond because she get an A1 for her SPM. I was shock of course. The reason? He didn't give me a RM100 for my A1!

Sigh~ Every good thing my sis has it. Why I said that? I'm JEALOUS. I get to work my ass out from my mum shop and she can go out with her friends EVERY SINGLE DAY.

I was pissed of course. I hate it when it happens to me like that. It's not fair. When I was her age, I never get to go out. During National Service, I have no freedom. She, on the other hand, Have a lot of freedom. But she didn't use the freedom in work. I can't believe. I don't even know why I'm jealous. Sigh~ I just don't like the way my parents treat her. But sometimes she's not an ass. Sigh! People people people.

First and Foremost

It's been a while since I notice I have blog. Recently Been busy with work (Beauty Consultant). Unbelievable? I know. But what the hey. It's my mum's business. I gotta work, aren't I? Life is HELL for me compare to my family and friends. They are HAPPY. But why not ME? I often ask myself the exact same question.

Is everything my parents give me isn't enough? I don't know. I expect too much from them. I don't want to be like those RICH ASS SPOIL BRATS. Hanging, shaking their foot and getting money from their parents. Worse of all, I'm going to those kind of college. RICH ASS vs the POOR RAT.

One more thing. Hate relationships. I've been cheated by one ass guy. Now I don't trust them. When will I be able to trust them again. I ain't no lesbo you know. I tried to be one but no girls dig me yo. *Laughs*.